Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries chill on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. (Photo: ScreenCap)

Kim Kardashian’s wedding was hardly a fairy tale. The first part of her two-hour wedding special last night set records for back-biting and sniping. Poor Khloe was scripted to play the heavy.

Nothing could be more fake, of course, than the contrived drama each week of the Kardashian’s reality television shows.

But this being Kim’s wedding, momager Kris Jenner must have decided to take her bitchy daughters and create something really special.

The big showdown (isn’t there always one?) was between Kim and Khloe.

Seems Khloe had it out for Kim’s betrothed Kris Humphries, the New Jersey Nets basketball player.

She just can’t get over the suspicion that he just might be using Kim to advance his own personal agenda, what ever that is. It’s unlikely Kim can improve his shooting percentage.

Khloe, 27, unleashes the dogs by confiding to the camera: “I’m worried about Kris Humphries’s intentions.”

“He sees Kim, who is this beautiful trophy wife, great personality… Kris has nothing to lose if he marries Kim and gets a divorce.”

The engagement and wedding did seem a little fast-tracked.

Finally, she confronts him: “I’m hoping that your intentions are pure,” she says, hinting that things are moving a little too fast.

Indeed, everyone knows Kim is still hung up on Reggie Bush, and his last-minute dramatics over the engagement is sure to factor into a future episode.

It’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s put on with these Kardashians, but when Kim finds about about her sister’s little heart-to-heart with her hubby-to-be, all hell breaks loose.

“What would ever make you believe you could say something like that?” Kim asked pointedly.

‘I’m just doing what everyone is saying behind his back,’ Khloe screams.

That causes Kim to blow a fuse at the whole family. “If all of you are talking s*** behind my back then there’s no reason why any of you should come to the wedding,” she retorted.

“So you don’t want me to come to your wedding?” Khloe screams.

“No I don’t,” Kim screams back.

But, as well all now know, Khloe was all smiles at the wedding.

For his part, it doesn’t take Kris long to learn that he’ll never be anything more than a bit player in the Kardashian circus. (Just ask Lamar)

Kris and Kim fight over wedding details, but it’s clear who holds the real power, momager Kris.

“The wedding is the bride’s day. I definitely want [Kris] to have his say, but not get crazy with it.”

Of course, you can’t blame Kim. Kris wanted a casino-themed wedding and a dog to carry the ring down the aisle.

‘You guys should just marry each other,” Kris snaps at Kim and her mother.

“I just don’t want to live life like Scott [Disick] and Bruce [Jenner] and end up in the passenger seat. That’s my biggest fear,” said Kris in one prescient moment.

Get used to it buddy. Get used to it.

“What you’re going to learn really fast in this family is that the men have no say so whatsoever and that’s in your prenup,” Khloe tells him in yet another put-down.

Scott, ultimately, offers the best piece of advice: “Keep your mouth shut,” he says.

Check out the video below.