Little Nas X came out when his hit song “Old Town Road” was at the top of the charts. Now, he’s using the launch of his new music video to share his feelings.
The singer, real name Montero Lamar Hill, has laid out his feelings in an emotional letter to his 14-year-old self about coming out publicly.
The letter coincides with the release of the music video for his song “Montero (Call Me By Your Name).”
Hill came out publicly as gay in 2019 when he was 20. He called the experience “scary” but important to “open doors for many other queer people to simply exist.”
The best way to express his feelings was in a letter to himself.
“Dear 14-year-old Montero, I wrote a song with our name in it. It’s about a guy I met last summer. I know we promised to never come out publicly, I know we promised to never be ‘that’ type of gay person, I know we promised to die with the secret, but this will open doors for many other queer people to simply exist,” he writes.
“You see this is very scary for me, people will be angry, they will say I’m pushing an agenda. But the truth is, I am. The agenda to make people stay the fuck out of other people’s lives and stop dictating who they should be. Sending you love from the future. -LNX.”
In the striking video, which is full of references to Greek mythology, Nas X shares a kiss with an alien and dances with the devil as he shares his “personal story of temptation, judgment and standing in the full power of his sexuality.”
The rapper previously recalled how he didn’t tell anyone – including his managers and record label – about his sexuality.
He chose to tell his father first.
“We have become closer,” he said about their relationship.
“I mean, especially now because I don’t have anything to hide. It was a shock for him. It’s still the beginning phase. I’m not comfortable bringing a guy around yet.”
Last summer, Nas X shared a teaser clip of himself lip-syncing to “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)”
He simply wrote: “CALL ME BY YOUR NAME”, and added the telephone and love heart exclamation mark emojis.
The track also pays homage to the 2017 movie blockbuster “Call Me By Your Name.”
Timothee Chalamet’s character Elio falls in love with Armie Hammer’s American graduate student alter ego Oliver when he comes to his family’s home in Italy to help him with his studies.
The film is set in the summer of 1983. Elio, who is 17, is spending the days with his family at their 17th-century villa in Lombardy, Italy.
He soon meets Oliver, a handsome doctoral student who’s working as an intern for Elio’s father.
Amid the sun-drenched splendor of their surroundings, Elio and Oliver discover the heady beauty of awakening desire over the course of a summer that will alter their lives forever,” according to the movie’s synopsis.
Hill, a rapper, singer, songwriter, and internet personality, scored a breakout hit with the release of his country rap single “Old Town Road.”
The song was a viral hit on the social media site Tik Tok, before it gained an international audience and spent 19 weeks on the Billboard 100 chart.
Billboard caused an uproar when it move the song to the Hot 100 chart from the Hot Country songs chart.
Music critic Robert Christgau called the move “racist.”
The song brings attention to the historic cultural erasure of African-Americans from both country music and the American frontier.
Nas X was the most-nominated male artist at the 62nd Annual Grammy Award and won awards for Best Music Video and Best Pop Duo/Group Performance.
‘Montero (Call Me By Your Name)’ is out now. Check out the video below.